It’s Kind of a Sad Story

A couple days ago I watched It’s Kind of a Funny Story, a movie based on a book by the same name (which I have not read). In it, the 16 year old main character feels overwhelmed and suicidal enough to be voluntarily committed to a psych ward. His experience played out somewhat similar to my own hospital stay at the age of 14. Without giving much away, it ends up being an uplifting tale about finding what you want out of life and remembering to appreciate the things and people around you.

But I am actually writing all this because Ned Vizzini, the author of the book, committed suicide not too long ago at the age of 32. And I am writing this because thinking about his death and writing leaves me a little lost.

I mean, here’s a guy who set out to inspire kids and help them through tough moments, and judging by the comments I saw on Reddit and Youtube I think he achieved that. But the grim side is that he killed himself. He had a wife and a kid, was a published author, a recognized talent, a guy who told people to call a suicide hotline and knew what a hospital stay might do for him. But he jumped off a building.

And I write all this not to criticize Ned Vizzini. I write this because it makes me think that some day in a depressed haze I might value the end of pain over growing old with a lover or seeing child grow, preferring nothingness to seeing another day and new potential. You can be as aware as you want of resources, be the most logical person possible, be successful and loved, and the pain can still override it all. And that scares me.

Advertisements

23 thoughts on “It’s Kind of a Sad Story

  1. MyHomeIsWriting

    In my own personal experience it is usually when I’m happiest, when life is actually going along pretty well, that I realize that within me there is no actual rhyme or reason for living; I am simply going through the motions for the sake of going through the motions. It is usually when life is aligning that suicide suddenly becomes more viable. I think part of that is because in my head I decide that I don’t want it to end, and in a way death will preserve that memory because nothing can come after.

    Reply
    1. Morgan

      I learned something similar in my psych of adolescents class, that usually when things start getting better and people start getting happier, is when they are more likely to commit suicide. because when you’re depressed, even killing yourself seems too difficult or not worth it, and when you start getting happier it seems simple. It also makes sense to want to preserve that happiness because you start to think it can only get worse from here.

      Reply
  2. doesitevenmatter3

    This IS a very sad story. 😦 I’m so sorry to hear about Ned. But, I admire him. His life and writing DID help other people. I understand (from personal experience) what his wife and child are going through. 😦

    You shared this post so brilliantly. Yes, sometimes the haze is so thick and painful, people make a choice.

    But, selfishly, I hope you will always chose to live…to fight…to hang on.

    You (and your writing) are a source of joy and help to me…you’ve been someone I think about, care about and root for. I believe in you. You have helped me to hang on. Thank you for that, MyFriend.

    (((HUGS)))

    Reply
    1. MyHomeIsWriting

      I second this. I know I’m not around here much, but when I do visit wordpress you are one of the few people whose work it is I’m deliberately looking for.

      Reply
    2. mclayburn1949

      That is a very sad story
      And it’s always good to have someone you can talk to when thing bother you and get you down
      I am not familure with the book or the author but I am going to make a point to get to know him,
      Sounds like an interesting book
      And I hope,you don’t get too down thinking of it!
      Take care there! Carolyn! And have a wonderful night! 🙂

      Reply
      1. mclayburn1949

        You are very welcome! And I appreciate you as well!
        And I posted one of the poems tht I wrote several years ago,hope you like it!
        You have a great night! Stay well,safe and happy! 🙂

  3. mclayburn1949

    That is enough to scare anyone,for sure,and it is good to always have someone who you can talk to,
    I have never read tht book,but sounds like an interesting one,and I know it alwys helps me when something is bothering me and I get scared adout one thing or another,to talk it out with someone
    You take care there,don’t let it get you too,down,, 🙂

    Reply
  4. digitalgranny

    This is very sad. I spent a lot of time in psych wards when I was younger do to botched suicide attempts and today, I am grateful I never made it.
    I have seen the movie and read the book.
    Very sad indeed.

    Reply
  5. Humor_Me_Now

    That is tragic. There is nothing else to say. it is also ironic that he was unable to take his own advice, but his book and movie inspirited others.

    Reply
  6. idocareforyou2

    HI CAROL, HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I HAVEN’T BEEN AROUND MUCH, FIGHTING MY ON INSECURITY AFTER SURGERY ON TOP OF ALL THE EXISTING PROBLEMS. I CAN RELATE TO YOUR STORY. SOME TIMES YOU JUST FEEL HEMMED IN. I NO THERE WILL BE A BRIGHTER DAY AND RELIED ON GOD FOR HELP. I SEE IN ALL THE COMMENTS NO RELIANCE ON OUR CREATOR FOR GUIDANCE. JESUS TELLS US ” I AM THE WAY THE TRUTH AND THE LIGHT. THERE IS NO DARKNESS IN ME” WE MUST LEARN TO REACH OUT WITH OUR HEART, TRUSTING HE WILL CALM OUR MIND! WE ARE IN TRANSIT TRAVELING HOME TO OUR CREATOR. A DESIRE TO END OUR LIFE NOW IS NOT IN ACCORD WITH OUR DESTINY, WE ARE HERE FOR A PURPOSE, AND MUST PRAY FOR DIVINE GUIDANCE.

    Reply
  7. 0hmyword

    This is sad, but it’s because of your honesty. I didn’t know Ned Vizzini, and not to diminish his death, but I do know you. There would be tremendous impact if your success and loved ones weren’t enough to override it all. All of this is selfishness; someone not wanting to loose another for their own reasons, as much as another putting an end to it all to ease their suffering.
    I don’t suffer from anything of any imperial significance, aside from my own ignorance [which I’ve learnt to accept], but I still fear that empty feeling of forever and not knowing what’s to come. I’m here for you, whatever you be in the need of wanting.
    Shan
    xxoo

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s